Wednesday, March 23, 2011

I'm Alive

So last week was all sorts of insane for me.  I experienced a "perfect storm" in school, which consisted of two major papers that were due on Tuesday and a big midterm on Wednesday.  I didn't have my favorite distraction to turn to (facebook) because I gave it up for Lent.  And even worse, Sam and I started a diet so I couldn't have any sugar or bread (my favorite things that make me feel better!)  Suffice it to say, last week I was sort of miserable to be around.  Poor Sam.

But I survived!  And because all my classes had big things last week, this week is a bit more relaxing.  I'm trying to work ahead in my classes and get some things done that had been neglected (like blogging, laundry, sleeping, showering).  And thankfully, Sam and I are off the diet.  Time and again I have discovered I'm just not a diet person.  The minute someone tells me I can't have something, I have an irresistible need for it.  So, though we are trying to incorporate more vegetables and eat less sugar, I'm back to my plan of healthy moderation.  And I'm a much nicer person. :)

I got to end my week in a pretty perfect way!  Our group of women from church led the music out at the women's retreat again this year, so I spent a very rainy weekend in the redwoods.  It was just what I needed after my overwhelming week!  I got to hang out with some lovely ladies (Lauren, Laurie, Kristen, Andrea, Leann, Christina, Abbey, and Savannah, to name a few) and had some great times playing banana grams and truth or dare with them.  (Yes, we played truth or dare.)  I also got to sing and play my guitar (which I haven't really done since the women's retreat last year and desperately miss), and I got to be out at Mt. Gilead and just enjoy it, as any other guest would!  Last year I was working at this retreat, so there was a lot more responsibility and stress involved.  Let me tell you, it was really nice to just be responsible for the music and nothing else.

Sue, our speaker, was hilarious and so refreshing.  She reminded me of some things I really needed to hear.  First of all, I don't have to be perfect.  Thank God.  So it's okay that my bed isn't made right now and that I haven't worked out in two weeks.  She also reminded us that we don't know the journey God has others on, or all that they've experienced, so there's no room for judgment.  Similarly, no one else knows my journey, so if they are judging, who cares?  It's like when people hear Sam & I moved back to Petaluma after three months and say something really ignorant like, "Well that didn't last long! Heh heh heh," or "Wow, guess you guys just couldn't stick it out, huh?" and I want to punch them because they have no idea of all the surrounding circumstances or all that we went through.  I don't have to punch them anymore because they're the ones being stupid, and that's really punishment in itself.  Instead, I can just rub it in their faces and say, "Well yes, it was pretty clear that God wanted us back up here so we were just trying to be obedient to Him.  Some people choose to do that."  :)  No, I'm kidding, people.  But really, I don't have to worry about what other people think of my decisions because they're not on my journey.  Wonderful!!!  I can let that go.

It was a very happy weekend full of much needed relaxation and fellowship, and while I was gone Sam got to go hang out with his family.  (He returned home with a beautiful painting by Sara and Heidi!  Can't wait to hang it up!)  It was a great Sabbath and I was reminded that I just need to relax, slow down, and give it all to God.  Crazy-overwhelmed-perfectionist Kimberly is not as fun as mellow-rested-doing-her-best Kimberly. 

Thanks for reading my silly blog!  Hopefully I'll be able to update a bit more now that I'm no longer in bondage to my own nonsense.  Happy day.

2 comments:

  1. You are alive!! I've wondered if you maybe you gave up blogging for Lent too - but I'm glad to know you haven't! =)

    This is great...a perfect realization! I was just saying to a friend the other day that our house is a disaster, we have no food, laundry is more than piled up, one car is broken and has been just sitting being ignored for over a week, and my legs are hairy (gross, I know)....but life is still so good and has surprisingly been filled with great moments of laughter, peace and perspective, all of which I am so grateful for. VERY MUCH looking forward to debriefing this and so many other thoughts in my head with you and Marc next weekend.
    love love love

    JulieAnn

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  2. I like mellow-rested-doing-her-best Kimberly! :) I'm glad your crazy week is over!! Now it's time for more fun and outdoorsy things (assuming this crazy rain and stormy weather ever moves on!)

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