Tuesday, August 21, 2012

My Week and Why it was Awesome

Last Monday, I began a fast from Facebook and blogs.  (Technically it is still going, so while I'm writing my own blog, I'm still not reading any others, and while I'll post it to Facebook, I won't actually get on Facebook.  Sort of cheating, not really.)

If you're one of those people who just uses Facebook to keep in touch with people, you probably don't need a break.  But if you're like me and you use it to keep score, you'll likely benefit.  Now, I know I'm not supposed to keep score.  But this is often how my Facebook time goes:

"Oh, they bought a house.  We don't know where we want to live."

"Oh look, she lost weight.  I've gained seven pounds."

"Oh nice, she's pregnant, too.  Good for all fifty of you pregnant people I know.  If you name your child (insert-any-of-the-names-I-have-picked-out-here) before I get to have a baby, we're not friends."

"Oh she got a promotion/her dream job/any job where you don't smell like coffee 24/7.  I still work at Starbucks."

Okay, so maybe I'm exaggerating, but sometimes that's how it feels.  I seem to log on to Facebook when I'm in a particularly weak, vulnerable place, when I'm not feeling great about myself, and when I want to feel sorry for myself.  I don't know if I ever thought Facebook would help me in those times, but guess what?  It doesn't.  It makes things worse.

The same often goes for blogs.  I don't know why, but sometimes I find myself reading blogs by people who are fashion-y, crafty, and decorat-y.  Guess who is most definitely not fashion-y, crafty, or decorat-y?  The girl in yoga pants, who is too impatient to wait for spray paint to dry.  (Me.)  Those are the things I'm least good at, so when I look at blogs that show these girls in cute outfits who just spray painted a new shelf for their house (which they own, by the way), and sewed their own curtains, I feel a little inadequate.  I seem to forget my own gifts and the things I like spending time on, focusing instead on the talents that I lack.

The truth is, it all came down to my heart.  I needed an overhaul of my attitude, and the only way I could think to do it was to avoid these things that only served to make things worse.  (Fortunately, Kari and I agreed to do it together, so I had someone keeping me accountable.)

Here is the basic in-your-face truth:

"That means we will not compare ourselves with each other as if one of us were better and another worse.  We have far more interesting things to do with our lives.  Each of us is an original." Gal. 5:26

I found this verse to be particularly helpful during the first week of my social media break.  And I discovered that I do have far more interesting things to do with my life.  My week was amazing, simply because time wasn't wasted on comparison.  When I didn't have that jealousy and competition bringing my down, I found I had the time and energy to focus on being the person I want to be, apart from any other expectations or comparisons with others.  So...



I exercised every single day.  This is probably not impressive to you people who already exercise daily (Janna), but I was pretty proud of myself.  By Sunday, I couldn't wait to work out, so I'm excited to be back in the groove of being active.  As a result, I had tons of energy and was in a much better mood, a fact that my sweet husband can attest to.  And with all that energy...



I only allowed myself one caffeinated beverage a day.  Again, unimpressive to those of you who aren't coffee fanatics, but this is coming from a girl who typically drinks three cups of coffee and has five or six espresso shots daily.  I used to blame it on my job, but then I remembered I have this little thing called willpower that I can choose to use if I so desire.  And I always wanted to be one of those cute people who couldn't drink too much caffeine without getting jittery.  Yesterday, that was me.  (Is it weird that I was really excited about that?)  Not only that, I discovered that I don't need all that coffee.  I still had plenty of energy (if not more than usual), and I slept really well at night.  Who would've thought??


I cooked and baked a lot, I got really disciplined about budgeting and recording all our purchases, and my sweet little guitar got some attention.  (Poor baby has been neglected since April.)  It was honestly one of the best weeks I've had in a long time.  Maybe when I'm ready to end my fast,  I'll have a new frame of mind with which to interact on Facebook, and those blogs that just intimidate me can begin to inspire me.

It was a great week because it sort of felt like I made New Year's Resolutions in August.  And we all know how much I love resolutions.  It's a lesson I have to learn over and over, but I want to be purposeful, using my time to cultivate peace, hope, and creativity, and not letting any time be wasted on discontentment or discouragement.

2 comments:

  1. great blog, Kimmy. I got off facebook two weeks ago, and I'm loving the time I'm not wasting doing exactly what you stated in your blog. I got off partially because I wanted my girls to have privacy and facebook is just a little too public, but also because it IS a little depressing if you aren't careful. There's so many people to compare yourself to and I have a hard enough time as it is being THANKFUL for the many blessings that I DO have and just fail to notice because I'm so self-absorbed or busy being jealous of someone else's blessings. I forget that they all have crosses too, in addition to their blessings, just as I do. My verse for the past few weeks has been one from Job: "The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away. Blessed be the name of the Lord". I feel I am constantly learning and relearning that both suffering and joys are something to be grateful for and regardless of which I am going through I need to praise Him through it.

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  2. Fabulous, just fabulous!!! Amazing weeks are the absolute best -- little can compare! =)

    I'm not huge into getting onto FB, but when I do I definitely have my moments of "look at _____. My life sucks" which is totally lame. I actually think part of me doesn't post anything (for the most part) on FB out of a little bit of pride, like I don't need to announce to the world that _______ happened because I'm totally satisfied and confident with my life. So if I'm honest with myself, I totally have FB issues that need attention too! =)

    BTW - I totally think of you as fashion-y and decorative-y and crafty. Ummmm...you always wear cute skirts, stockings, hats, etc. I am always so jealous of how great you are at putting random things together to make something magnificent -- I could never pull that off. Also, do you remember that you used placemats to decorate your kitchen in Petaluma? If that is not genius, then I don't know what is...

    Don't sell yourself short. You are amazing in so many ways and I think we all do a pretty good job of trying to make ourselves look awesome with the latest and greatest (fill in the blank) instead of encouraging others.

    So basically, I miss you and this post made my heart smile!

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